The North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017

The full crew is back to talk about hiding out, the North Texas Gas Crisis, hushpuppies, Comanches and much more.  Right off the bat they start off with Long John Silvers, hushpuppies and catfish restaurant talk (again).  But that doesn’t last long as Heavy attacks Gus and tries to blame him for the North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017.  Blame may be a strong word, but Heavy does believe Gus had a hand in it.  Heavy also recounts Gus and the global rice shortage many years ago.

north texas gas crisis

Gus once again stresses that everyone should have at least 72 hours worth of food and water on hand for an emergency situation.  That leads to a twitter question from Tell wondering what the boys would recommend to have with them if they had to go into hiding in West Texas.  Surprisingly enough, they don’t give a straight answer and they ultimately leave out a lot things.

Gus recalls alt-country/Americana singer/songwriter Kevin Welch’s song “Wilson’s Tracks”and from there Heavy talks about how he was a house guest in the Seattle area once upon a time.  That leads to a discussion about natural resources availability and the effect that scarcity had on whether or not Native American tribes established more stable settlements which led to increased population densities.  That leads to Gus mentioning the Japanese explorer/Zunni language hypothesis which will need to be further investigated.

Ty has been reading “The Empire of the Sun and the Moon” about the Comanche nation and that leads to a lot of discussion about Comanche raiding parties during the 1700’s and 1800’s.

Heavy talks about the response to Hurricane Harvey and ties back to the Eastern Bloc with a story about his friend’s Hungarian wife and her baked bean conundrum.

They finally get back to Tell’s question but they get hung up on the “Two is One, One is None” redundant equipment philosophy.

 

If you would like the guys to talk in earnest about emergency preparedness or if you just want us to keep flitting from one topic to the next, email us at CanYouHearMePod@gmail.com

 

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Gus’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Royal Tenenbaums.

Mexican Internet

Once again Ray Ranfill joins Heavy and Gus to talk old movies, answer emails and debate the merits of ordering things off of the Mexican Internet.  Ty is busy doing “paperwork” once again, or possibly doing research for his new side project with Megan from Megan’s Movie Podcast where they analyze each and every line from Tootsie.

Gustav gets the ball rolling with a  field report from a pawn shop and offers up a little show and tell for the boys.  He also discusses the wide open nature of black powder pistols for those citizens who may not be able to legally purchase a cartridge firearm.

There is some highbrow grandstanding as Gustav brags about reading fancy books such as William Faulkner’s Sound and the Fury, but Heavy tries to keep him in check.

Jay responds to his own email about the fascinating world of Sun Truthers which Gus and Heavy had never even heard of before.

There is some talk about the American institute of trial by jury, Bitcoin and HBO’s classic series The Wire.

mexican internetAn email from KJ about hangovers leads the three to ask where you would you rather order IV solution from the Canadian Internet of the Mexican Internet and you really can’t pass that up for an episode name at that point.

Ray talks about how awesome he is at fantasy sports betting and the like.

Fake Bailey Jay takes the boys to task about some hot sports opinions about Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, which leads to a very disappointing conversation with Heavy and Jay about their opinions about the film.  But further discussion about Tarrantino’s work is more positive.

The movie talk leads Ray to ask about regretting showing your kids certain movies.  Gus tells about how he had his kids watch the unedited Blaxploitation classic “Cotton Comes to Harlem” and how he forgot a few jubblies that may have been left out of the edited version.  He also talks about the fun action comedy “True Lies”

 

So send us your emails about movies, single shot shotguns or jury selection to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.

 

Dirt Track

Join the guys for a special guest , a field report from the dirt track and much much more.  Since Ty is too busy with “paperwork”,  long time friend of the show Ray Ranfill was kind enough to join us.

Straight out of the gate, Gustav takes a stand against Grandy’s and recalls a special moment that he and Heavy shared many moons ago at a 903 area code Grandy’s. Then Gustav tries to establish some street cred with a story about how he frequents a  local taqueria.   And while he’s all hopped up on food talk, he rails against mixing corn into other dishes.

dirt track

Matt’s fist full of cash he won at the dirt track

But the real focus of the show is the tale of Gus and Jay going to the Grayson County Speedway with Matt and St. Ginsburg.  Gustav was busy taking notes and asking long time racing enthusiast Jay questi0ns.  It was a fun night and Matt even won money!  But going back to food, Gus offers hot sports opinions about “the walking taco”

Once again Gus brainstorms about a Greyhound bus trip and dreams of the possibilities for the show.  It will probably never happen, but if it does, then you will hear all about it.  Then Gus drifts into talk about FarmAid 92 and how he hopes to do an entire Farm Aid episode some time in the future.

So send us your emails about bus trips, Cutlass Supremes or your fun at dirt tracks or drag races to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own Captain and Tenille cover band.

 

 

 

The Tale of Honey Mellons

Ty and Gus are back this week to answer listener Twitter questions, wax poetic ad talk about an exotic dancer named Honey Mellons.  Despite their best efforts and lighting numerous signal fires with the hope of luring him home, Heavy Longmire is still hiding somewhere in the wilderness.  Perhaps some day he will return.  But until that day comes, you are stuck with Ty and Gustav who truly do love you.

Ty starts off telling a story from his misspent youth in a honky tonk.  Cody sends a tweet about love that causes the boys to reflect on first loves.  Cody follows up with a tweet that makes Ty tell about the time he got lost in East Texas.  Gus revisits stumbling on a compound and then once again they touch base on the Satanic scare of the late eighties/early nineties.

The boys love all things related to eighties television so they spend an inordinate amount of time talking about the first episode of Fantasy Island, the parallel between Mr. Roarke and the Old Testament Jehova, and Roddy McDowell’s guest appearances as the devil.  And once again, they talk about their crush on Erin Grey from Buck Rogers.

The man from Baltimore proposes a conundrum involving John Wayne, Wilford Brimley and Marty Robbins which will certainly have Pretty Little Ranch Wife firing off a strongly worded email in weeks to come.  Gus gets far too excited about the Statler Brothers and their appearance on the Marty Robbins show back in the seventies.

Gus talks about how he’s been watching the Santa Clarita Diet on Netflix and how Timothy Olyphant’s character reminds him a lot of one Ty Webb.

former exotic dancer and model Honey Mellons

Another Dabney Coleman mention occurs for anyone keeping score at home and Rusty asks about nipples. Gus has been thinking about nipples on the way to record, so he has some thoughts on the subject.  Then he tells the story of how an exotic dancer named Honey Mellons made everyone who worked at his grocery store lose their minds one chilly night in Lubbock in 1993.

So send us your emails about nipples, the time you saw Honey Mellons at the grocery store or which actor you think looks like Ty  to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

 

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Curly Bill

Once again, Ty and Gustav are without the one and only Heavy Longmire, but they somehow manage to appreciate art, talk about Curly Bill and much much more.

As we continue into our second month without Heavy, Gustav makes a stand against kids with Mohawks while Ty for some reason makes a stand against one of the show’s nicest listeners.   Gus objects but they finally come to an agreement on kids with rat tails.

If you remember the episode with the sad creepy clown painting, you know that Gustav loves “art”.  He unveils a new painting he has discovered and discusses the work of Ernesto Blume.  Ernesto painted a portrait of Powers Boothe as Curly Bill from Tombstone.  Gustav maps out his plan for further collaboration with Ernesto Blume and Can You Hear Me listeners.

powers boothe curly bill ernesto blume

Ernesto Blume’s Portrait of Curly Bill

With Curly Bill looking down on Ty and Gus, they talk about the impact of Powers Boothe’s career on the CYHM collective psyche. Boothe starred in classics such as Deadwood, Frailty, Southern Comfort, Deadwood, and much more.  One of his most powerful roles was as Jim Jones.  While Ty seeks further refreshment, Gus recaps the story of Jim Jones and the Jonestown tragedy.

Ty fondly recalls Sports Illustrated swimsuit issues for a bit.  Then they discuss the problematic nature of the “back room” at small town video stores.  That somehow leads Ty to tell his stories about a couple of near misses with local law enforcement during the early nineties in the 903.

So send us your emails about Powers Boothe, running from the law or Heavy Longmire spottings  to canyouhearmepod@gmai

l.com

Be sure to listen to listen to Gustav’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast on the Blowout Podcast Network where he and Megan talk about Tombstone.

And listen to Brad each week on his own podcast Below the Belt

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Professor Brad – Off the Grid

This week is the much anticipated second part of the award winning face to face interview with Professor Brad where more twitter questions are answered, crazy theories are explored and Brad lays out his plan for off the grid living.

As you remember from the first part of this interview, Ty was away and the late great Heavy Longmire is lost on the prairie for all we know. But Professor Brad was kind enough to join Gustav for pseudo-intellectual mumbo jumbo.  This episode picks up with more questions submitted by our faithful listeners via Twitter, including hypotheticals (we hope) over what someone would do for a year’s supply of food or for someone’s latest book to make it to the top of  the New York Times bestseller list.

Once the Twitter questions were done, the conversation turns to submarine talk with more hypermasculinity talk as well as a couple of apochryphal stories that may or may not be true.

marfa texas off the gridFor a while, Brad had been wanting to talk to Gustav about the logistics of going off the grid.  Brad has his eyes set on the rugged scenery around Marfa, Texas.  So far Brad has a plan and a materials list, but Gus does his best to shoot holes in Brad’s dream, the way that a slightly inebriated uncle can ruin Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and a belief in fiat currency.  Gus talks a bit about his dalliance with solar power in the past and some problems that he sees with living the off the grid lifestyle in Texas.

For some reason Brad then changes the conversation to Climate Change (probably to get Gustav wound up).  The two of them then dive into talk of ice ages, pre-Columbian environmental pollution, Terrence McKenna’s theory that magic mushrooms caused the development of language, fracking earthquakes and wondering whatever happened to the hole in the ozone layer and acid rain.

So send us your emails about living in a half buried shipping container, climate change, or the first dirty joke you told your dad to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

And listen to Brad each week on his own podcast Below the Belt

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

 

Ty and Gus’s Summer Job

Episode 67 finds Ty and Gus without Heavy so they spend the evening talking about homemade tattoos, their old summer job, Val Kilmer and assorted other nonsense.

On a recent trip back to the hometown, Gus took his kids on a tour of the town where he correlated everything to My Name is Earl.  Talking about the old places, gets Ty and Gus on the subject of homemade tattoos of their co-workers from their summer job.  The old summer job had a lot of characters and it left a long term mark on the guys.

summer job

Ty taking a break from working back in 1992

Ty talks hauling hay which leads to talk about the King of the County (at least back then).

Gus reveals how finding something from 20 years ago shows how he got fat.

The guys grew up in a time of hazing and swats and recall how much things have changed over the years.

A listener in Germany identifies where some of the recent spike in foreign listeners have come from.  But we still want to hear from anyone else that is listening outside of the borders of Texas.

In a week or two Gus will be guesting on Megan’s Movie Podcast.  Ty wants to make sure Gus represents the career of Val Kilmer appropriately and gives credit where credit is due.  That leads to some discussion about the cast of Real Genius and plastic surgery.   Somehow that leads to circumcision talk, yet again.

Gus and Mrs. Gus stumbled onto Adult Swim’s Black Jesus and it’s not bad but not great.

And we put out the call for a video tape copy of Heavy’s high school senior play because we really want to see Heavy singing and dancing.

So send us your emails about summer jobs, bad tattoos and hazing tales to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Check out Megan’s Movie Podcast

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Three Wide in a S-10

This week the guys talk about recent acts they’ve seen, carnivals, hitchhiking, a harrowing tale of being three wide in a S-10, Cheers and Michael Keaton.

Gustav starts off the episode with a field report about the Steve Martin and Martin Short show he recently saw, as well as comparing and contrasting it to the John Cleese and Eric Idle show from earlier in the year.  Heavy talks about his anniversary date to go see the Drive-by-Truckers at the Granada with a stop to see Chef Rob before the show.

The boy’s lament missing the Old 97’s Country Fair this year with a hint of remorse about last year’s County Fair and the lost episode.  Ty tells about his most recent use of Craig’s List to unload tickets to the Fortress Festival.

Fair talk leads to carnival talk as the guys remember winning roach clips and age inappropriate mirrors from the carnies.  Gus tells a freak show story and recalls being stuck when a ride broke. The ever present theme of the freedom and inherent danger of a kids life in the eighties presents itself once again.

three wide s-10 ad

Don’t Find Yourself Three Wide in a S-10

Heavy tells the story of a little traveling Mexican Circus he took his family too after church one day.  The traveling life opens the question of taking an RV across the country.  RV travel naturally leads to talk of train hopping and former railroad man Pappy Longmire.  Ty has a great story of how his friends in college hopped a train and ended up in a very uncomfortable situation and found themselves three wide in a S-10 pickup.  That story leads to more hitchhiking talk including a tale of Point Break Dave from Tell Me Where to Turn Podcast fame.

Ty and Gus engage in Michael Keaton talk with a focus on Night Shift, Mr. Mom and Birdman.  Heavy can’t help himself and makes a Gung-Ho joke in hopes of derailing the conversation.  While remembering the eighties, the guys talk MASH and Cheers.

Gus is dying to talk about Beyond the Valley of the Dolls but has to explain to Heavy who Russ Meyer was so that goes nowhere.  Ty has an idea for a premium content episode about Three’s Company.

So send us your emails of carnies, hitchhiking and your own three wide tales to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Foreign Listeners

The Can You Hear Me boys are back with a mish mash of mustache talk, a mystery, thoughts on the S-Town podcast, Gustav’s report on foreign listeners and emails from the faithful.

To get things going Gustav reveals a mystery that he has encountered recently.  Heavy and Ty do their best to get to the bottom of problem.

Then they discuss the wildly popular S-Town podcast and how close to home it feels to the 903 area code, where the guys were born and raised.  They also discuss some of the problems that they identified with the podcast.

gene shalit on today show with tom brokaw

Somehow they get onto mustache talk, partly brought on by a recent spell of Gene Shalit jokes.  Gene was the mustachioed film critic for NBC’s Today show for years and not0rious for bad pun

foreign listeners can you hear me

Vintage Japanese Radio Ad promoting Can You Hear Me?

s and sometimes questionable reviews.

Long time listener Fake Bailey Jay has a couple of emails chastising Gustav for possible inaccuracies and omissions.

Touching back on the previous misogynistic discussion about female singers of the seventies and eighties, Gustav brings up one the sisters from Heart and Ty ties it all back to the mountain climber game on the Price is Right.

 

Gustav has an interesting report on a recent upsurge in foreign listeners of Can You Hear Me.  The new hotbeds for Can You Hear Me downloads outside the U.S. are Japan and Germany.  Heavy has a theory why but Gus just wants to know who these people are and why they listen to the ramblings of educated hillbillies.

They also have a new female listener who sends in a t-shirt idea and is currently trying to make her way through the entire back catalog of episodes.

So send us your emails telling us where you are listening from and how you found out about us to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod