The North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017

The full crew is back to talk about hiding out, the North Texas Gas Crisis, hushpuppies, Comanches and much more.  Right off the bat they start off with Long John Silvers, hushpuppies and catfish restaurant talk (again).  But that doesn’t last long as Heavy attacks Gus and tries to blame him for the North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017.  Blame may be a strong word, but Heavy does believe Gus had a hand in it.  Heavy also recounts Gus and the global rice shortage many years ago.

north texas gas crisis

Gus once again stresses that everyone should have at least 72 hours worth of food and water on hand for an emergency situation.  That leads to a twitter question from Tell wondering what the boys would recommend to have with them if they had to go into hiding in West Texas.  Surprisingly enough, they don’t give a straight answer and they ultimately leave out a lot things.

Gus recalls alt-country/Americana singer/songwriter Kevin Welch’s song “Wilson’s Tracks”and from there Heavy talks about how he was a house guest in the Seattle area once upon a time.  That leads to a discussion about natural resources availability and the effect that scarcity had on whether or not Native American tribes established more stable settlements which led to increased population densities.  That leads to Gus mentioning the Japanese explorer/Zunni language hypothesis which will need to be further investigated.

Ty has been reading “The Empire of the Sun and the Moon” about the Comanche nation and that leads to a lot of discussion about Comanche raiding parties during the 1700’s and 1800’s.

Heavy talks about the response to Hurricane Harvey and ties back to the Eastern Bloc with a story about his friend’s Hungarian wife and her baked bean conundrum.

They finally get back to Tell’s question but they get hung up on the “Two is One, One is None” redundant equipment philosophy.

 

If you would like the guys to talk in earnest about emergency preparedness or if you just want us to keep flitting from one topic to the next, email us at CanYouHearMePod@gmail.com

 

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Gus’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Royal Tenenbaums.

Mexican Internet

Once again Ray Ranfill joins Heavy and Gus to talk old movies, answer emails and debate the merits of ordering things off of the Mexican Internet.  Ty is busy doing “paperwork” once again, or possibly doing research for his new side project with Megan from Megan’s Movie Podcast where they analyze each and every line from Tootsie.

Gustav gets the ball rolling with a  field report from a pawn shop and offers up a little show and tell for the boys.  He also discusses the wide open nature of black powder pistols for those citizens who may not be able to legally purchase a cartridge firearm.

There is some highbrow grandstanding as Gustav brags about reading fancy books such as William Faulkner’s Sound and the Fury, but Heavy tries to keep him in check.

Jay responds to his own email about the fascinating world of Sun Truthers which Gus and Heavy had never even heard of before.

There is some talk about the American institute of trial by jury, Bitcoin and HBO’s classic series The Wire.

mexican internetAn email from KJ about hangovers leads the three to ask where you would you rather order IV solution from the Canadian Internet of the Mexican Internet and you really can’t pass that up for an episode name at that point.

Ray talks about how awesome he is at fantasy sports betting and the like.

Fake Bailey Jay takes the boys to task about some hot sports opinions about Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, which leads to a very disappointing conversation with Heavy and Jay about their opinions about the film.  But further discussion about Tarrantino’s work is more positive.

The movie talk leads Ray to ask about regretting showing your kids certain movies.  Gus tells about how he had his kids watch the unedited Blaxploitation classic “Cotton Comes to Harlem” and how he forgot a few jubblies that may have been left out of the edited version.  He also talks about the fun action comedy “True Lies”

 

So send us your emails about movies, single shot shotguns or jury selection to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.

 

Dopamine Hypothesis

Heavy, Gustav and special guest Ray Ranfill settle in for a slightly more serious episode where they make a few jokes, but mostly talk about the opioid epidemic and the dopamine hypothesis.  Once again Ty is busy doing “paperwork” but Ray was kind enough to stick around for another round of our nonsense.

Gustav jumps right out with another tale of things his kids say.  Then Heavy explains a little bit about Coors and how it worked into the plot of Smokey and the Bandit.   They follow up with some school days stories including eccentric algebra teachers, leaky roofs and flooded rooms.

The ghost of Clay is invoked once more.  He’s always with us all. Then Gustav makes a stand for the Waltons and is ready to fight Heavy about it.

Ray and Gus bond over their t-shirts based on IJB and Cirque du Sirois hosts.  You can’t mention t-shirts without talking about Heavy’s World Class Championship Wrestling t-shirt which leads to a brief conspiracy discussion about the death of the Yellow Rose David Von Erich in Japan.

Then Heavy brings up diarrhea from traveling in the third world and Gus talks about parasites for a while.  Then he talks at length about Toxoplasma gondii and how it may have a connection to schizophrenia.

dopamine hypothesisSomehow that changes to Heavy talking about the Dopamine Hypothesis and the idea that SSRI’s are not effective longterm.   This discussion leads to us tackling the opioid epidemic and alcohol detox symptoms.  Gus can’t talk about addiction deaths without touching back to the late great Townes Van Zandt’s final days.

So send us your emails about drugs, eccentric teachers, parasites or the Von Erichs to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own podcast focusing on the works of Russ Meyer.

 

 

 

Dirt Track

Join the guys for a special guest , a field report from the dirt track and much much more.  Since Ty is too busy with “paperwork”,  long time friend of the show Ray Ranfill was kind enough to join us.

Straight out of the gate, Gustav takes a stand against Grandy’s and recalls a special moment that he and Heavy shared many moons ago at a 903 area code Grandy’s. Then Gustav tries to establish some street cred with a story about how he frequents a  local taqueria.   And while he’s all hopped up on food talk, he rails against mixing corn into other dishes.

dirt track

Matt’s fist full of cash he won at the dirt track

But the real focus of the show is the tale of Gus and Jay going to the Grayson County Speedway with Matt and St. Ginsburg.  Gustav was busy taking notes and asking long time racing enthusiast Jay questi0ns.  It was a fun night and Matt even won money!  But going back to food, Gus offers hot sports opinions about “the walking taco”

Once again Gus brainstorms about a Greyhound bus trip and dreams of the possibilities for the show.  It will probably never happen, but if it does, then you will hear all about it.  Then Gus drifts into talk about FarmAid 92 and how he hopes to do an entire Farm Aid episode some time in the future.

So send us your emails about bus trips, Cutlass Supremes or your fun at dirt tracks or drag races to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own Captain and Tenille cover band.

 

 

 

What is a Yankee?

Heavy, Ty and Gustav are back to answer emails, Twitter questions and have Heavy tell us what is a yankee.

Right off the bat, we apologize for some technical difficulties that we encountered during the editing of this episode.  We will try to do better moving forward, but we say that to the women in our lives, so don’t hold your breath.

For this episode, we put out the call to the listeners for emails and Twitter questions and once again you did not disappoint.  Except for Fake Bailey Jay who continues to disappoint us by not joining us in person.

Steve from Baltimore sent in a great email asking about what it means to be a Texan.  That leads Heavy to climb upon his soapbox, start pulling out maps and to try and get Ty and Gus to read some pamphlets he’s been working on.  That leads to Gus and Ty asking Heavy “What is a Yankee?”  That leads to it’s own lecture and once he is done, you will all be clear on his criteria.

mason-dixon line

Aaron , Tom and Fake Sports Bot send a ton of Twitter questions ranging from cigarettes, lawyers, gold, and topical tropical islands.

Gus has a show and tell with some recent additions to his vintage record collection.

Then the audio problem interrupts the guys having some serious old man talk.  And to further derail the good times, Heavy starts talking about politics in the 903 area code.

 

So send us your emails about geographic distinctions, Texas highways or vintage vinyl stories to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own Peaches and Herb cover band.

Tawny Kitaen Was On the Cover

Buckle up for a stream of conscience episode where the guys discuss water parks, free will, genetics and what album cover Tawny Kitaen was on.

If you hadn’t heard, America’s Favorite, Heavy Longmire is back on board and full of things to say.  We appreciate you sticking through two months of the Ty and Gus show.  To get things going, Gustav talks a bit about his kids being obsessed with zombies currently.  No doubt their father’s paranoia about the collapse of civilization has seeped into their little minds.  That leads to some gun talk, repo men stereotypes, the American Anarachist documentary, time traveling Gustav and more nutkicking about Tesla.

Heavy, unused to being in civilization, totally changes the conversation to an article Valley Butcher sent the boys about the wheels off history of Texas politics.

Ty then discusses his hatred of water parks after a recent outing with his family.  Gustav describes what it’s like to head to any public pool in the 903 area code.

Thinking back to their youth, the boys discuss Tawny Kitaen and her hotness in Whitesnake videos and album covers.  That leads to discussion about Kelly LeBrock and Weird Science.

tawny kitaen album cover for Ratt "Out of the Cellar"

She damn sure was on the album cover!

Going in a completely different direction, Ty then takes the dialogue into the world of free will, neuroscience and genetics.  Once again the evil spectre of eugenics raises it’s ugly head.  A discussion of the benefits of programs like Early Childhood Intervention ensues.

Heavy gets into physics talk and Gus describes his organic chemistry experiences in college.

So send us your emails about free will, your favorite eighties album cover girl or water park stories to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.

America’s Favorite

Ty and Gustav are back with a myriad of topics and an unfortunate claim from someone that they are America’s Favorite.  Things get heated early on as Gustav must defend the comments he made about climate change back during the Professor Brad guest appearance.

america's favorite podcast

Things settle down for a little bit of moccasin talk.  Gus delivers an update on a prominent moccasin manufacturer’s omission of  classic style and then espouses the best traditional moccasin for walking around on rocks.

Alt-Country performer Nikki Lane has been getting some airplay so that reminds Ty and Gus of the time that she met Heavy Longmire at the Old 97’s County Fair.

The boys then turn to talk about scorpions and they wonder about their decline in the 903 compared to when they were youngsters back in the seventies and eighties.  Scorpion talk naturally leads to a discussion about 1981’s “The Clash of the Titans”  and some thrilling moments as they look up names of actresses on their phones.

Willie Nelson and Family’s music festival at Starplex is then discussed as well as the stances of lawn or seats.

Gus recounts the one testical bear trap story for anyone who may have missed it the first time he told it.

Ty discusses his first bout with acid reflux and how Copenhagen and cheap beer subsequently affected it.

John Prine was just discovered by Ty so they talk about that even though Gus got Heavy listening to him back in high school.

And Gus updates us with a surge in listeners in Virginia and everyone agrees that Virginia is for Lovers.

So send us your emails about America’s Favorite, the time you saw Willie Nelson or what you think happened to the scorpions to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

 

 

Touch of Evil

Ty and Gustav are back for an episode where they answer listener emails and talk about old movies like Rear Window and Touch of Evil.  Sorry to sadden anyone, but once again, this is an episode without the one and only Heavy Longmire.  Maybe in the future, he will return to the fold.

Gus gets the ball rolling with a story of premature aging and discusses how people approach him for help in stores.  The guys then talk about Heavy’s propensity to close talk and discuss a recent report about an unbelievably high number of heterosexual men reporting to have cuddled other men in a non-sexual way.

Gus reads a couple of emails from Pretty Ranch Wife as she works through the back catalog of listeners.  She addresses recent roadkill adventures out in West Texas which leads Gus to tell the story of a classmate’s run in with a buzzard back in the eighties and how it ruined the dress of the kid’s mom.

Once again Ty lobbies for an appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast.  In lieu of a appearance on a far more successful podcast, Ty and Gus head down the film path and discuss gay characters in Westerns like Tombstone and There Was a Crooked Man.  That somehow leads them to Charles Nelson Reilly (once again).  They then talk about how much they love Alfred Hitchcock movies like Rope, Rear Window, Vertigo, and The Trouble with Harry.  Not surprisingly, Ty discusses Grace Kelly and Gus has some thin shaming comments to make.

film noir classic Touch of Evil

Orson Wells and Charlton Heston in Touch of Evil

Ultimately they turn to the subject of remakes which they have mixed feelings about and that leads to a brief discussion of film noir and they both geek out about the classic Orson Wells film “Touch of Evil”

So send us your emails about film noir, roadkill, Chuck Berry  or which tv shows you wish Charles Nelson Reilly had been a guest star on to  canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

The Tale of Honey Mellons

Ty and Gus are back this week to answer listener Twitter questions, wax poetic ad talk about an exotic dancer named Honey Mellons.  Despite their best efforts and lighting numerous signal fires with the hope of luring him home, Heavy Longmire is still hiding somewhere in the wilderness.  Perhaps some day he will return.  But until that day comes, you are stuck with Ty and Gustav who truly do love you.

Ty starts off telling a story from his misspent youth in a honky tonk.  Cody sends a tweet about love that causes the boys to reflect on first loves.  Cody follows up with a tweet that makes Ty tell about the time he got lost in East Texas.  Gus revisits stumbling on a compound and then once again they touch base on the Satanic scare of the late eighties/early nineties.

The boys love all things related to eighties television so they spend an inordinate amount of time talking about the first episode of Fantasy Island, the parallel between Mr. Roarke and the Old Testament Jehova, and Roddy McDowell’s guest appearances as the devil.  And once again, they talk about their crush on Erin Grey from Buck Rogers.

The man from Baltimore proposes a conundrum involving John Wayne, Wilford Brimley and Marty Robbins which will certainly have Pretty Little Ranch Wife firing off a strongly worded email in weeks to come.  Gus gets far too excited about the Statler Brothers and their appearance on the Marty Robbins show back in the seventies.

Gus talks about how he’s been watching the Santa Clarita Diet on Netflix and how Timothy Olyphant’s character reminds him a lot of one Ty Webb.

former exotic dancer and model Honey Mellons

Another Dabney Coleman mention occurs for anyone keeping score at home and Rusty asks about nipples. Gus has been thinking about nipples on the way to record, so he has some thoughts on the subject.  Then he tells the story of how an exotic dancer named Honey Mellons made everyone who worked at his grocery store lose their minds one chilly night in Lubbock in 1993.

So send us your emails about nipples, the time you saw Honey Mellons at the grocery store or which actor you think looks like Ty  to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

 

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod