Gene Shalit is Alive and Well

After several months, Ty returns to discuss Gene Shalit, old high school yearbooks and other nonsense.  Heavy is off trying to find a good crappie spot, so Ty and Gustav have to record without him.

 

Being men of a certain age, they discuss hair cuts, rogue hairs and eyebrow trimming before they retell the story of Heavy at the family night and his campaign to be the mayor of the 903 area code.

Ty recently got four copies of his mom’s high school yearbooks so they talk about Father Monteblanc who is featured prominently and how different the high school kids of early seventies and late sixties looked compared to subsequent generations.

Speaking of high school, Gustav retells the story of his poor French teacher and how after almost 30 years, she is still haunted by the memories of teaching Gustav to ecoute et repute.

They discuss the decline of family reunions and how Megan’s family reunion t-shirt caused awkwardness.  Then Ty relates how Megan’s dad is pissed at him for an ice cream recommendation.

Speaking of Megan’s Movie Podcast the boys turn to film and film critics.  Gustav talks about Bobby Wygant and Siskel and Ebert, and then they wonder if Gene Shalit is Alive and Well.   On air fact checking confirms he is, at least at the time of the recording.

gene shalit film critic

It’s either Gene Shalit or the Wizard of Oz

They then discuss Peter Bogdonovich, Ben Johnson and the Last Picture Show as well as Russ Meyer movies, Mexican Charlton Heston in Touch of Evil, Marilyn Chambers as the Ivory Snow girl and Beyond the Valley of the Dolls.

 

It’s a fast paced stream of conscience episode so buckle up.

 

Let us know which Russ Meyer film is the best, who your favorite film critic was, or what movies you would like Megan to review bye sending five dollars and a self addressed stamp to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Does Rambo III Count?

Heavy and Gustav are joined by special guest Ray Ranfill to discuss smuggling, eighties tv shows and Rambo III.  As you well know, Ray Ranfill is a long time friend of the show and frequent emailer who we have been lucky enough to have join us once again.

To start the episode, Heavy discusses a news story about liquid meth and Gus reads a story from Arizona about a cache of plastic explosives that someone accidentally dug up.

Twitter questions lead us into a discussion about Jan Smithers, Erin Gray or someone else and then that leads Gustav to a shocking confession (alright not that shocking) about Mrs. Garrett from Diff’rent Strokes and Facts of Life fame.  Heavy then upsets Gustav concerning a guest star on Facts of Life.

rambo III afghanistan

Attention turns to war movies and the boys rattle off a bunch of good ones.  Heavy wanted the movies listed, so here you go:

 

Tora! Tora! Tora!

Midway

A Bridge Too Far

The Longest Day

Cross of Iron

Saving Private Ryan

Bridge Over River Kwai

Apocalypse Now Redux

The Deer Hunter

Full Metal Jacket

Platoon

Rambo 3

We Were Soldiers

Hurt Locker

Lone Survivor

Blackhawk Down

BAT 21

First Blood

Hamburger Hill

Rambo: First Blood Part 2

Rambo III

Red Dawn

 

Then Gustav geeks out and explains comic book movies and the general comic book universes to a questioning Heavy.  Howard the Duck gets mentioned again and Gustav continues to ponder the awesomeness of Rambo III and it’s final battle.

So send us your emails about smuggling, eighties tv shows or your favorite war movies to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Professor Brad – Dragon’s Lair

Since Heavy and Ty are still absent without leave, Gustave recruited Professor Brad to talk about movies, productivity, Dragon’s Lair and much more.   This week will be appearance one for Professor Brad in a special two week engagement.

Starting of Brad and Gus discuss all of Brad’s major awards as he is the only doctor on the Blowout Podcast Network, where he co-hosts the Below the Belt Podcast with his friend and smiley man Ryan.  Gustav then turns the discussion towards science fiction books and movies set or made before computers became what they are today.  That leads to a discussion about 2001: A Space Odyssey and the works of Stanley Kubrick, including A Clockwork Orange, The Shining and Eyes Wide Shut.  (In a glaring omission, Gustav fails to mention Kubrick’s Vietnam masterpiece, Full Metal Jacket, but he will discuss it in an upcoming episode that has since been recorded).

You can’t talk to Brad too long about anything without video games coming up.  So the discussion going from “arcades” of a certain type over to the classic Leisure Suit Larry mature themed video game series just seems natural.  That in turn bridges from the game mechanics of Sierra style games of the eighties to Gustav’s memories about failing at the classic eighties arcade game Dragon’s Lair.  Then Brad and Gustav discuss how they are both suffering from a perceived lack of productivity in their objectives.

 

dragon's lair arcade game

A Death Cut Scene From Dragon’s Lair

So send us your emails about arcades, Dragon’s Lair, eighties games or your favorite sci-fi to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Support Big Tails

Ty and Gustav are back for more fun as they talk about how they support big tails, brown drink and old albums as they answer listener emails and Snapchats.

Heavy is off hiding his scent from beavers, so Gus and Ty do their best to keep the machine going.   They start off by acknowledging once again the influence the boys over at the It’s Just Banter podcast (also known as IJB) had on them getting started a year and a half ago.  And once again they talk about the classic film  “The Conversation”  (if you haven’t seen it yet, you should stop and go watch it, then you’ll know why we are crazy about it.)

Ty lobbies for another appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast and Gus reads some questions Megan sent in via Snapchat.  Ty and Gus are unanimous in their answer to Megan’s question.  Gus brings up a new argument against dinosaurs he saw on the internet and goes on record that he is someone who will support big tails.

support big tails

Does the angle even work?

 

Ty remembers some cassettes he wore the printing off of back in jr. high and high school.  The boys list off classic albums like Keith Whitley’s Greatest Hits and Pronounced Lynyrd Skynyrd.  They also talk about the importance of a good B side back in the days of cassettes and vinyl.

Gus talks about tanning hides or the at least the failures of attempting to tan hides.  Ty tells about the time he went hunting before class once.  Enterstandman sends a thought provoking email.  Gus shows off a new toy.   Dan from Melbourne follows up some proper English discussion from episodes past.  Hernandez and Ernesto send in their questions/thoughts about brown drink for Ty.  And ValleyButcher asks about smells.

So send us your emails about dinosaurs, favorite smells, bourbon ,  or rifle cartridges to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Mexican Internet

Once again Ray Ranfill joins Heavy and Gus to talk old movies, answer emails and debate the merits of ordering things off of the Mexican Internet.  Ty is busy doing “paperwork” once again, or possibly doing research for his new side project with Megan from Megan’s Movie Podcast where they analyze each and every line from Tootsie.

Gustav gets the ball rolling with a  field report from a pawn shop and offers up a little show and tell for the boys.  He also discusses the wide open nature of black powder pistols for those citizens who may not be able to legally purchase a cartridge firearm.

There is some highbrow grandstanding as Gustav brags about reading fancy books such as William Faulkner’s Sound and the Fury, but Heavy tries to keep him in check.

Jay responds to his own email about the fascinating world of Sun Truthers which Gus and Heavy had never even heard of before.

There is some talk about the American institute of trial by jury, Bitcoin and HBO’s classic series The Wire.

mexican internetAn email from KJ about hangovers leads the three to ask where you would you rather order IV solution from the Canadian Internet of the Mexican Internet and you really can’t pass that up for an episode name at that point.

Ray talks about how awesome he is at fantasy sports betting and the like.

Fake Bailey Jay takes the boys to task about some hot sports opinions about Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, which leads to a very disappointing conversation with Heavy and Jay about their opinions about the film.  But further discussion about Tarrantino’s work is more positive.

The movie talk leads Ray to ask about regretting showing your kids certain movies.  Gus tells about how he had his kids watch the unedited Blaxploitation classic “Cotton Comes to Harlem” and how he forgot a few jubblies that may have been left out of the edited version.  He also talks about the fun action comedy “True Lies”

 

So send us your emails about movies, single shot shotguns or jury selection to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.

 

Touch of Evil

Ty and Gustav are back for an episode where they answer listener emails and talk about old movies like Rear Window and Touch of Evil.  Sorry to sadden anyone, but once again, this is an episode without the one and only Heavy Longmire.  Maybe in the future, he will return to the fold.

Gus gets the ball rolling with a story of premature aging and discusses how people approach him for help in stores.  The guys then talk about Heavy’s propensity to close talk and discuss a recent report about an unbelievably high number of heterosexual men reporting to have cuddled other men in a non-sexual way.

Gus reads a couple of emails from Pretty Ranch Wife as she works through the back catalog of listeners.  She addresses recent roadkill adventures out in West Texas which leads Gus to tell the story of a classmate’s run in with a buzzard back in the eighties and how it ruined the dress of the kid’s mom.

Once again Ty lobbies for an appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast.  In lieu of a appearance on a far more successful podcast, Ty and Gus head down the film path and discuss gay characters in Westerns like Tombstone and There Was a Crooked Man.  That somehow leads them to Charles Nelson Reilly (once again).  They then talk about how much they love Alfred Hitchcock movies like Rope, Rear Window, Vertigo, and The Trouble with Harry.  Not surprisingly, Ty discusses Grace Kelly and Gus has some thin shaming comments to make.

film noir classic Touch of Evil

Orson Wells and Charlton Heston in Touch of Evil

Ultimately they turn to the subject of remakes which they have mixed feelings about and that leads to a brief discussion of film noir and they both geek out about the classic Orson Wells film “Touch of Evil”

So send us your emails about film noir, roadkill, Chuck Berry  or which tv shows you wish Charles Nelson Reilly had been a guest star on to  canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Gary Gnu and Family Heirlooms

After so many weeks of jocularity, your three favorite educated hillbillies wander into semi-serious topics as they discuss business owners rights, Gary Gnu, and family heirlooms with a a few detours along the way.

We start this week’s voyage off with Heavy trying to sing once more.  If you like that sort of thing, then you are in luck. If you don’t like it, wait it out because it thankfully only lasts a short while. Inspired by his own singing, he shares with us a tale of him trying to bond with one of his daughters over Michael Jackson music.  That leads to some talk about seventies and eighties kids shows like the Lost Saucer and Wonderbug, which somehow leads to Gus claiming one of the actors in Wonderbug would go on to star as a non-porn role in the infamous New Wave Hookers 2.  (check out his credits on IMDB!)  Then Heavy tells how Mrs. Longmire tried to pronunciation shame him on the pronunciation of “GNU” but he defended the attack by citing the Gary Gnu show from The Great Space Coaster!  Heavy also offers up some New Wave fun facts (the music, not the porno movie) and Gus and Heavy have stories of stupid stuff their kids have said lately.

gary gnu holding family heirloom

Gary Gnu Holding Heavy’s Family Heirloom

Gus then stears the ship into a serious discussion about separating the art from the artist and how society changes their views on a persons creations if that person may fall out of favor due to actions or new facts emerging about their character.  Somehow that leads to a discussion about states rights, the rights of a business owner to refuse service and the legal and moral implications of private citizens excluding customers based on any number of criteria.  Obviously, we needed J.J.’s legal opinion, so hopefully he will correct us via email.

Speaking of email, Tellito sends in a thought provoking email about family heirlooms which leads the guys down memory lane and man is it dusty and dry.

Email us your legal opinions, stories of family heirlooms and thoughts on the sins of the creator to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Find us on Twitter @realgustav @longmireheavy @tywebb3000 and @canyouhearmepod

Follow us on Instagram, Tumblr and Snapchat @canyouhearmepod

 

Heavy’s World Famous Baked Beans

The full Can You Hear Me crew is back this week for insane ideas, funny stories and Heavy’s World Famous Baked Beans.  After Gustav’s history lecture last week, the boys are ready to make each other laugh.

Despite trying to have a discussion about college sports team gear, Gustav derails the conversation early on with elbow talk and makes himself laugh more than any person should.  The guys get back on track and talk about the nature of Texas college sports fans.  Then Heavy and Gus vaguely remember a story about the horse from Texas Tech and recount an incident which may or may not have happened, but it makes for a good story either way (we are fully expecting hate mail from all sides after this segment).

Gus asks “what made you funny?” and Ty tries to answer while Heavy works to undermine the conversation.  Ty brings up Sid Caesar’s Show of Shows and Gustav tries to discuss the Marx Brothers, but it goes no where fast.

Then they turn their attention to a Twitter question about why they don’t use the song “Silent Running” by Mike and the Mechanics in the show open.  Gustav has reasons and he lays them out for you (but it is a great song from the eighties!).

Professor Brad sends Gustav texts throughout the episode which Gustav shares with the audience. Someday he will make a guest appearance, but only via texts this week.

heavy longmire's world famous baked beans

Get a Can of Heavy’s Baked Beans Wherever Trapping Supplies are Sold

Ty then gives some Oscar talk before Heavy talks way too much about his world famous baked beans.  The look of pride on his face as he talked about these baked beans was prouder than we have ever seen.

Then, on  a roll, Heavy talks about something extremely large he found.  This is a story not for the squeamish or more delicate listeners.  Plus Ty gives some further thoughts to his timing challenge.

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Email us at canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Don’t send us pics of your logs

Nightcaps, Porky’s and Outdoor Magazines

All three of the crew are back for this week’s NSFW conversation that covers old-timey nightcaps, the 80’s classic Porky’s and Gustav’s questionable taste in outdoor magazines.

The boys start off with a little post Christmas clean up talk but soon wander into the story of how Mrs. Gustav did something to lead Gustav into being, as he put it, “not opposed to nightcaps.”  This leads then to a discussion about current eighties movies on Netflix, Ty’s love of Vision Quest starring Matthew Modine and Linda Fiorentino, and The Man with One Red Shoe, starring Tom Hanks and the greatness of Dabney Coleman.

Gustav then pulls out a copy of one of his favorite outdoors magazines and shares this issues’s table of contents, many of which with questionable interest to anyone other than Gustav and Heavy.  Heavy and Gus then discuss other magazines related to self-sufficiency, homesteading and general 903 interests.

Then attention turns to George DiGionni’s nut kicking display and Gustav recounts the Polynesian’s dad being in a nut kicking contest back in the late sixties.  Ty then recalls his odd drive-thru experience and may have just coined the term “frotterist” This leads to frottage, scissoring and tribbing talk with some odd hand gestures that the listener will just have to figure out for themselves.

If you like stories about the stuff Gustav’s kids say, you are in luck because he has two incidents for you this week.  Heavy has some questionable recollections about Old Testamant scripture and later denies any knowledge of the “popcorn trick”.

porky's eighties movie kim cattrall

Eighties Kids Remember the Hotness of Kim Cattrall in Porky’s

They circle back to eighties movies with a discussion about Porky’s, the hotness of Kim Cattrall and how Porky’s 2 helped Ty in a tough time.  To finish off, they respond to an email from one of Gustav’s former work wives.

You can email us your fond memories of Porky’s, frotterism or nightcaps to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Tweet us @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @longmireheavy or @tywebb3000

Follow us on Instagram @canyouhearmepod and join in the conversation on our subreddit r/canyouhearme.

Thirty Seconds of Fury

It’s a shame, but due to the brown drink, over 30 minutes of stories which the phrase “thirty seconds of fury” originated in had to be edited out to protect the guilty.  But there is still plenty of nonsense and listener emails to make it worth your while.

At the start, Gustav is feeling nostalgic for the days of the early eighties when watching music videos out in the country meant having to wait for Friday Night Videos to come on or to catch a syndicated video show hosted by Bo and Jim from Q102, now KZPS.  There was no cable out in the country, so no MTV, unless you were one of the lucky ones with a giant satellite dish out in the yard and some sort of probably illegal decoder on top of your Zenith or Quasar fake wood paneled tv set.

The great Austin finally sent us in an email and he asks who would we cast to play ourselves in the inevitable blockbuster feature film adaptation of the Can You Hear Me podcast. Please email or tweet us who you would like to see portray your favorite educated hillbillies on the silver screen.  Austin also shares with us a wonderfully weird artifact from the sixties called “Communism, Hypnotism, and the Beatles” by David E. Noebel.  We weren’t aware that the three were related.  It sounds more like a Can You Hear Me episode title instead of an actual book.

the beatles, communism, hypnotims, cold war sixties

Communism, Hypnotism and the Beatles by David E. Noebel

Long time good time West Texas Travis sends us an email that disturbs all three members.  Then JJ warms our hearts with a tale of fisticuffs as he stands up to some Houston punks.  We also lay the foundation for our upcoming William F. Buckley Jr. episode so be sure to do your homework and watch “Best of Enemies” on Netflix to learn the background of the Gore Vidal and William F. Buckley debates during the 1968 presidential election.

As always, please email us your stories, questions or observations to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com