Bonsai and French Fry

Heavy and Gustav are back to talk bonsai trees, french fries, childhood dangers and all you can eat catfish.   In what may be the most boring start ever to a podcast Heavy and Gustav seriously discuss bonsai trees.  There ought to be a listener warning that the segment may induce sleep while driving or operating heavy machinery.  But they are truly interested in such things and that’s just where the conversation went.

Gus acknowledges Heavy’s supreme knowledge of trees amongst the three of them (even though Ty isn’t there to lay claim to the crown).  So Heavy discusses an innovative professor he had in college and the wacky horticulture he engaged in.  They also discuss parks and show a general lack of knowledge.

Luckily, some listeners were kind enough to send in questions.  Returning to the.270 vs 30-06 question, Heavy gives his answer.  Then they turn to their dangerous childhood with lawn darts, battery operated trucks, pop rocks and a general apathy toward seat belts.

bonsai and french fry

Then they hit their stride as they weigh in on the best way to French fry potatoes.  Emboldened, Heavy actually ranks the fast food franchises for their french fries.  That makes them think then about all you can eat catfish places and Gus wonders if they even exist in the big city.  Heavy is particularly interested if anyone knows of an all you can eat catfish place around the Lake Lavon area.

 

Good dude Ray Ranfill sends an email about Braum’s that fits nicely into french fry talk.

 

So send us your emails about bonsai trees,  french fries, lawn dart injuries ,  or rifle cartridges to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

 

Also be sure to tell your friends and neighbors that this episode is a bit more boring than usual and not to judge us too harshly.  Ty will be back soon.

 

 

 

 

 

City of Heavy – Crappie Filets

America has spoken, so Heavy has his own episode this week to talk about crappie filets, documentaries, and what ever else suits him.  He’s always maintained that he is America’s favorite and the one and only.  So it only made sense to give loyal listeners and future generations a special episode dedicated to Heavy.

crappie filets

To get the ball rolling, Heavy shares with you his favorite way to prepare Crappie filets.  Get out those index cards to write down this info so that you can pass it on down to your grandkids.  Then Heavy engages in some international diplomacy with our Australian and Ecuadoran listeners.  Find out what Heavy knows about Australia and Mel Gibson’s ranting.

Heavy has recently watched a movie based on the life of British Colonel Percival Fawcett called the Lost City of Z, so he shares his thoughts on it and the role of historical timeline proximity and how it shapes generational perceptions of events.

Having rewatched the Ken Burns’ Civil War documentary and as he currently watches the Vietnam series, Heavy has thoughts about documentaries and the work of Ken Burns.  He ponders the narrative challenge to stay neutral in telling of historical events.  Then he turns his attention to a recent TED Talk he watched regarding America being founded on the principal of genocide.  He discusses the plight of the Native American’s, Depression era lynchings, the American Indian Movement’s occupation of both Alcatraz and Wounded Knee as well as the 24 hour news cycle.  And once again William F. Buckley is referenced in regard to the Huey Newton episode of Firing Line.

 

So send us your emails about how to prepare crappie filets, historical perspective, or if you want more Heavy solo episodes to  canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

 

Dirt Track

Join the guys for a special guest , a field report from the dirt track and much much more.  Since Ty is too busy with “paperwork”,  long time friend of the show Ray Ranfill was kind enough to join us.

Straight out of the gate, Gustav takes a stand against Grandy’s and recalls a special moment that he and Heavy shared many moons ago at a 903 area code Grandy’s. Then Gustav tries to establish some street cred with a story about how he frequents a  local taqueria.   And while he’s all hopped up on food talk, he rails against mixing corn into other dishes.

dirt track

Matt’s fist full of cash he won at the dirt track

But the real focus of the show is the tale of Gus and Jay going to the Grayson County Speedway with Matt and St. Ginsburg.  Gustav was busy taking notes and asking long time racing enthusiast Jay questi0ns.  It was a fun night and Matt even won money!  But going back to food, Gus offers hot sports opinions about “the walking taco”

Once again Gus brainstorms about a Greyhound bus trip and dreams of the possibilities for the show.  It will probably never happen, but if it does, then you will hear all about it.  Then Gus drifts into talk about FarmAid 92 and how he hopes to do an entire Farm Aid episode some time in the future.

So send us your emails about bus trips, Cutlass Supremes or your fun at dirt tracks or drag races to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own Captain and Tenille cover band.

 

 

 

Squirrel Hunting with a Blowgun

Episode 58 finds the boys answering emails, making each other laugh and Heavy asking if we’ve ever been squirrel hunting with a blowgun.  Straight out of the gate, Heavy is offering up million dollar ideas including “Beaver Box”.

Ty is wound up after a trip to Ranger’s spring training and he shares his argument with his younger brother about the safety of un-refrigerated mayonnaise.  This leads to a discussion about whether other condiments need refrigeration including the jellies and jams.  At one point someone says “Fritos and Mayonnaise”, which almost became this episode’s title.

In Episdoe 57, the guys talk about the Canadian TV show Letterkenny.  So you may wonder why Gustav basically repeats himself this week in order to tell a story about a run in with a treasure trail.  It would be nice to say that it was an intentional reset for listeners who may not have been by the channel for Episode 57.  But the truth is that we recorded Ep 57 two weeks after recording Ep 58, but jumped it ahead in order to document Matt’s finding of the “Coke is the Real Thing” commercial.  So that means in two short weeks, Gustav had completely forgotten what they had talked about when they recorded this episode.

They turn to emails and first up is nicest guy in the world Tom with some questions about vacation spots in Texas.  We pretty much let Heavy answer this one and collect a check from the San Antonio Tourism Office.

Next up we have emails from two of the three hosts of the Tell Me Where to Turn podcast.  Tommy offers up a hypothetical and Glen fires off an email aimed at a lot of different people.  Then Gustav goes off on a rant about ATF barrel length regulations and for some reason Heavy asks “Ever gone squirrel hunting with a blowgun?”

hunting a squirrel with a blowgun

Heavy will Soon be Offering Guided Squirrel Blowgun Hunts

And Ty and Gus geek out about Mike Wallace from Sixty Minutes fame.

Email us your ideas of what our next careers should be as well as any Texas vacation destinations to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

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Heavy’s World Famous Baked Beans

The full Can You Hear Me crew is back this week for insane ideas, funny stories and Heavy’s World Famous Baked Beans.  After Gustav’s history lecture last week, the boys are ready to make each other laugh.

Despite trying to have a discussion about college sports team gear, Gustav derails the conversation early on with elbow talk and makes himself laugh more than any person should.  The guys get back on track and talk about the nature of Texas college sports fans.  Then Heavy and Gus vaguely remember a story about the horse from Texas Tech and recount an incident which may or may not have happened, but it makes for a good story either way (we are fully expecting hate mail from all sides after this segment).

Gus asks “what made you funny?” and Ty tries to answer while Heavy works to undermine the conversation.  Ty brings up Sid Caesar’s Show of Shows and Gustav tries to discuss the Marx Brothers, but it goes no where fast.

Then they turn their attention to a Twitter question about why they don’t use the song “Silent Running” by Mike and the Mechanics in the show open.  Gustav has reasons and he lays them out for you (but it is a great song from the eighties!).

Professor Brad sends Gustav texts throughout the episode which Gustav shares with the audience. Someday he will make a guest appearance, but only via texts this week.

heavy longmire's world famous baked beans

Get a Can of Heavy’s Baked Beans Wherever Trapping Supplies are Sold

Ty then gives some Oscar talk before Heavy talks way too much about his world famous baked beans.  The look of pride on his face as he talked about these baked beans was prouder than we have ever seen.

Then, on  a roll, Heavy talks about something extremely large he found.  This is a story not for the squeamish or more delicate listeners.  Plus Ty gives some further thoughts to his timing challenge.

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Email us at canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Don’t send us pics of your logs

That’s Me and Bananas

Listen to this week’s episode for a listener email about cruise ships, hot sports opinions about Dairy Queen Blizzards and Gustav’s weird stance on bananas.

Following up on Ty’s strange time measurement challenge from last week, Gustav asks about nighttime bathroom habits to get the conversation going.  Ty shares a dangerous story of going to the bathroom while Gus and Heavy make fun of him.

Ty and Heavy then stumble into some Alex Jones talk, stealing a page from the likes of IJB but then Ty starts challenging Gustav’s libertarian beliefs, probing to see exactly what he believes covering everything from home distillation to seat belts.

Long time good time listener Chef Rob (aka the Seafood Sorcerer) sends in an email based on recent Twitter conversations regarding cruise ships.  Gustav recounts past cruises and Heavy chimes in with his horrible experience.  Cruise talk leads to a discussion of whether or not we take too many pictures in this digital age.

banana suitSomehow we end up on the discussion of Dairy Queen Blizzards (imagine us talking about food…seems impossible). Gustav of course has some contrarian opinions on this staple of the ice cream based treats.  Which of course then leads him down a rabbit trail about banana flavored medicine called Paregoric.  His experiences with the camphorated tincture of opium known as Paregoric changed his life in a way that Heavy and Ty have a hard time comprehending.  And Paregoric gave us today’s episode title “That’s Me and Bananas”.

Email us your favorite Dairy Queen Blizzard flavor, your time trials to beat Ty or your own libertarian rants to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

You can also join us on reddit at r/canyouhearmepod

Follow us on Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Find us on Twitter @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy @canyouhearmepod

And you can SnapChat us (if you are going to send nudes, please make sure they are tasteful and well lit).

 

Estate Sale Surprise

In one of the most string of consciousness episodes to date, the Can You Hear Me gang deals with listener emails, mattress talk, rodeos, an estate sale surprise and much much more.

Never afraid to show just how old they are the guys head straight into the ditch with eighties country music talk followed up with a charming review of a Red River Valley diner that existed back in the early nineties.  Then if that wasn’t enough to show that they are old men, they spend a segment talking about old quilts and mattresses.

An email from Crandyman Ray Ranfill himself pulls us out of the ditch for a little while until Ty fires off some hot sports opinions about the phenomenon of the father/daughter dance.

Gustav had been saving the tale of an Estate Sale Surprise that he encountered years ago.  But this seemed like as good a time as any.  Find out what he found and why you should make arrangements with a trusted friend to get rid of all of your most depraved sexual possessions.  The poor old women running this estate sale had no idea what this bag full of leather and steel accoutrements where when they picked up and priced each item.  But your friend Gustav knew.

surprise bag of cock rings at an estate sale

Bag of Cock Rings at an Estate Sale

Good dude Tom sent an email asking the guys if they had ever been in any rodeo events and tells us how he survived his own rodeo career.  Because Tom loves Popeye’s Chicken, they guys then spend some time talking about fried chicken and Gustav tells how he’s on a low-to-no carb diet which is unfathomable to Heavy.

Email us your estate sale surprise stories, fried chicken preferences or any other random things to Canyouhearmepod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Tweet us @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy or @canyouhearmpod

Congratulations to our friend KJ and Clay with Partial Recall on their recent joining of the Blowout Podcast Network.

Mourning Gene Wilder, Baloney, and a MacBeth Joke

The boys are back in Episode 33 to mourn Gene Wilder, answer listener emails,  talk about baloney and deal with a very unfortunate MacBeth joke.  Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

This week finds the crew in good spirits, even though Heavy tries to sink the thing with a bad Ronnie Milsap joke straight out of the chute.  A tweet from long time listener/field correspondent causes Gustav to wax poetic about Hunter S. Thompson’s lawyer in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.  This leads to a discussion about the author and some of his works.

Gustav then shares how the loss of Gene Wilder really affected Mrs. Gustav.  The boys are all fans of Wilder’s work, so they spend a few minutes recounting some of his legacy and their fondness of him.

Then they tackle listener emails.  Gustav must rephrase his way through a mine field of loaded words while reading the sordid tale sent to us by one of our listeners working on an advanced degree.  Said listener almost redeems himself with a wonderful MacBeth joke, but the guys are too far gone into old man mode and they spend the next few minutes warning him of all the things that soap and water can’t wash off.

gene wilder as willy wonka

Next up, an email from crowd favorite yet Machine hated Crandyman asks the boys about baloney (or bologna for you high society folks with all your fancy talking).  It may surprise you that Heavy has some very specific thoughts and beliefs regarding this round mystery meat.

They then wrap it up with a couple of emails from lady listeners.  One gal is curious about who it’s okay to think about during your special alone time .  The other wants to know how to figure out if your friends are something more than boring vanilla types and how to let your partner know you are down for some more advanced activities (nudge nudge, wink wink).  Surprisingly, they guys somehow give some fairly mature advice.

If you have thoughts, complaints, stories, or general nonsense to share, please email us at canyouhearmepod@gmail.com