The North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017

The full crew is back to talk about hiding out, the North Texas Gas Crisis, hushpuppies, Comanches and much more.  Right off the bat they start off with Long John Silvers, hushpuppies and catfish restaurant talk (again).  But that doesn’t last long as Heavy attacks Gus and tries to blame him for the North Texas Gas Crisis of 2017.  Blame may be a strong word, but Heavy does believe Gus had a hand in it.  Heavy also recounts Gus and the global rice shortage many years ago.

north texas gas crisis

Gus once again stresses that everyone should have at least 72 hours worth of food and water on hand for an emergency situation.  That leads to a twitter question from Tell wondering what the boys would recommend to have with them if they had to go into hiding in West Texas.  Surprisingly enough, they don’t give a straight answer and they ultimately leave out a lot things.

Gus recalls alt-country/Americana singer/songwriter Kevin Welch’s song “Wilson’s Tracks”and from there Heavy talks about how he was a house guest in the Seattle area once upon a time.  That leads to a discussion about natural resources availability and the effect that scarcity had on whether or not Native American tribes established more stable settlements which led to increased population densities.  That leads to Gus mentioning the Japanese explorer/Zunni language hypothesis which will need to be further investigated.

Ty has been reading “The Empire of the Sun and the Moon” about the Comanche nation and that leads to a lot of discussion about Comanche raiding parties during the 1700’s and 1800’s.

Heavy talks about the response to Hurricane Harvey and ties back to the Eastern Bloc with a story about his friend’s Hungarian wife and her baked bean conundrum.

They finally get back to Tell’s question but they get hung up on the “Two is One, One is None” redundant equipment philosophy.

 

If you would like the guys to talk in earnest about emergency preparedness or if you just want us to keep flitting from one topic to the next, email us at CanYouHearMePod@gmail.com

 

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Gus’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Royal Tenenbaums.

Mexican Internet

Once again Ray Ranfill joins Heavy and Gus to talk old movies, answer emails and debate the merits of ordering things off of the Mexican Internet.  Ty is busy doing “paperwork” once again, or possibly doing research for his new side project with Megan from Megan’s Movie Podcast where they analyze each and every line from Tootsie.

Gustav gets the ball rolling with a  field report from a pawn shop and offers up a little show and tell for the boys.  He also discusses the wide open nature of black powder pistols for those citizens who may not be able to legally purchase a cartridge firearm.

There is some highbrow grandstanding as Gustav brags about reading fancy books such as William Faulkner’s Sound and the Fury, but Heavy tries to keep him in check.

Jay responds to his own email about the fascinating world of Sun Truthers which Gus and Heavy had never even heard of before.

There is some talk about the American institute of trial by jury, Bitcoin and HBO’s classic series The Wire.

mexican internetAn email from KJ about hangovers leads the three to ask where you would you rather order IV solution from the Canadian Internet of the Mexican Internet and you really can’t pass that up for an episode name at that point.

Ray talks about how awesome he is at fantasy sports betting and the like.

Fake Bailey Jay takes the boys to task about some hot sports opinions about Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, which leads to a very disappointing conversation with Heavy and Jay about their opinions about the film.  But further discussion about Tarrantino’s work is more positive.

The movie talk leads Ray to ask about regretting showing your kids certain movies.  Gus tells about how he had his kids watch the unedited Blaxploitation classic “Cotton Comes to Harlem” and how he forgot a few jubblies that may have been left out of the edited version.  He also talks about the fun action comedy “True Lies”

 

So send us your emails about movies, single shot shotguns or jury selection to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.

 

What is a Yankee?

Heavy, Ty and Gustav are back to answer emails, Twitter questions and have Heavy tell us what is a yankee.

Right off the bat, we apologize for some technical difficulties that we encountered during the editing of this episode.  We will try to do better moving forward, but we say that to the women in our lives, so don’t hold your breath.

For this episode, we put out the call to the listeners for emails and Twitter questions and once again you did not disappoint.  Except for Fake Bailey Jay who continues to disappoint us by not joining us in person.

Steve from Baltimore sent in a great email asking about what it means to be a Texan.  That leads Heavy to climb upon his soapbox, start pulling out maps and to try and get Ty and Gus to read some pamphlets he’s been working on.  That leads to Gus and Ty asking Heavy “What is a Yankee?”  That leads to it’s own lecture and once he is done, you will all be clear on his criteria.

mason-dixon line

Aaron , Tom and Fake Sports Bot send a ton of Twitter questions ranging from cigarettes, lawyers, gold, and topical tropical islands.

Gus has a show and tell with some recent additions to his vintage record collection.

Then the audio problem interrupts the guys having some serious old man talk.  And to further derail the good times, Heavy starts talking about politics in the 903 area code.

 

So send us your emails about geographic distinctions, Texas highways or vintage vinyl stories to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Also be sure to check out Ty’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast where they discuss The Breakfast Club.  Who knows how much longer till Ty and Megan start their own Peaches and Herb cover band.

The Tale of the Melted Fork

While Heavy Longmire is still out trapping muskrat, Ty and Gus got together to talk old game shows, share a story about a melted fork, kick around some hardware ideas and do a little dentist talk.

Ty starts things off with a story about the former child actor, his jeep, a college cop, and some shade tree mechanics.  The shade tree mechanics lead Gus back to another co-worker from the previous episode’s stories about their first job.

Gus wonders about the species of grass which may contain the same chemical that is in vanilla and shows that he knows way too much about Hierochloe oderata.  The vanilla talk leads the boys down a path back to a vague and ultimately incorrect memory about an episode of Family Ties where someone drinks vanilla extract for the alcohol.  Gus and Ty are dead wrong on which character it was.  Be sure to listen to the outro to see if you can identify the very famous voice who actually did drink the vanilla extract.

Recently Gus went to get his teeth cleaned and had a really bad time while on nitrous oxide.  Ty then drops a bomb shell on Gus which leaves Gus worried about how long Ty has left on this earth.

melted fork

Oops……

Then Gus tells Ty about a trip to his parents where he saw his brother and how one thing led to another and then there was a smoker, a melted fork and some cussing.  That led to his brother doing some bourbon fueled welding to “fix” the melted fork.

melted fork rebuilt

We have the technology to rebuild him…

Ty shares the story of his grandmother on famous game show.  Once again they then dive into game show talk and fondly remember the Price is Right and the Gong Show.  Then they geek out over Tom Snyder and Joe Franklin for a while.

So send us your emails about  game shows, bad trips and crap you’ve melted to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Be sure to listen to listen to Gustav’s guest appearance on Megan’s Movie Podcast on the Blowout Podcast Network where he and Megan talk about Tombstone.

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

 

Ty and Gus’s Summer Job

Episode 67 finds Ty and Gus without Heavy so they spend the evening talking about homemade tattoos, their old summer job, Val Kilmer and assorted other nonsense.

On a recent trip back to the hometown, Gus took his kids on a tour of the town where he correlated everything to My Name is Earl.  Talking about the old places, gets Ty and Gus on the subject of homemade tattoos of their co-workers from their summer job.  The old summer job had a lot of characters and it left a long term mark on the guys.

summer job

Ty taking a break from working back in 1992

Ty talks hauling hay which leads to talk about the King of the County (at least back then).

Gus reveals how finding something from 20 years ago shows how he got fat.

The guys grew up in a time of hazing and swats and recall how much things have changed over the years.

A listener in Germany identifies where some of the recent spike in foreign listeners have come from.  But we still want to hear from anyone else that is listening outside of the borders of Texas.

In a week or two Gus will be guesting on Megan’s Movie Podcast.  Ty wants to make sure Gus represents the career of Val Kilmer appropriately and gives credit where credit is due.  That leads to some discussion about the cast of Real Genius and plastic surgery.   Somehow that leads to circumcision talk, yet again.

Gus and Mrs. Gus stumbled onto Adult Swim’s Black Jesus and it’s not bad but not great.

And we put out the call for a video tape copy of Heavy’s high school senior play because we really want to see Heavy singing and dancing.

So send us your emails about summer jobs, bad tattoos and hazing tales to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Check out Megan’s Movie Podcast

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Three Wide in a S-10

This week the guys talk about recent acts they’ve seen, carnivals, hitchhiking, a harrowing tale of being three wide in a S-10, Cheers and Michael Keaton.

Gustav starts off the episode with a field report about the Steve Martin and Martin Short show he recently saw, as well as comparing and contrasting it to the John Cleese and Eric Idle show from earlier in the year.  Heavy talks about his anniversary date to go see the Drive-by-Truckers at the Granada with a stop to see Chef Rob before the show.

The boy’s lament missing the Old 97’s Country Fair this year with a hint of remorse about last year’s County Fair and the lost episode.  Ty tells about his most recent use of Craig’s List to unload tickets to the Fortress Festival.

Fair talk leads to carnival talk as the guys remember winning roach clips and age inappropriate mirrors from the carnies.  Gus tells a freak show story and recalls being stuck when a ride broke. The ever present theme of the freedom and inherent danger of a kids life in the eighties presents itself once again.

three wide s-10 ad

Don’t Find Yourself Three Wide in a S-10

Heavy tells the story of a little traveling Mexican Circus he took his family too after church one day.  The traveling life opens the question of taking an RV across the country.  RV travel naturally leads to talk of train hopping and former railroad man Pappy Longmire.  Ty has a great story of how his friends in college hopped a train and ended up in a very uncomfortable situation and found themselves three wide in a S-10 pickup.  That story leads to more hitchhiking talk including a tale of Point Break Dave from Tell Me Where to Turn Podcast fame.

Ty and Gus engage in Michael Keaton talk with a focus on Night Shift, Mr. Mom and Birdman.  Heavy can’t help himself and makes a Gung-Ho joke in hopes of derailing the conversation.  While remembering the eighties, the guys talk MASH and Cheers.

Gus is dying to talk about Beyond the Valley of the Dolls but has to explain to Heavy who Russ Meyer was so that goes nowhere.  Ty has an idea for a premium content episode about Three’s Company.

So send us your emails of carnies, hitchhiking and your own three wide tales to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

 

Foreign Listeners

The Can You Hear Me boys are back with a mish mash of mustache talk, a mystery, thoughts on the S-Town podcast, Gustav’s report on foreign listeners and emails from the faithful.

To get things going Gustav reveals a mystery that he has encountered recently.  Heavy and Ty do their best to get to the bottom of problem.

Then they discuss the wildly popular S-Town podcast and how close to home it feels to the 903 area code, where the guys were born and raised.  They also discuss some of the problems that they identified with the podcast.

gene shalit on today show with tom brokaw

Somehow they get onto mustache talk, partly brought on by a recent spell of Gene Shalit jokes.  Gene was the mustachioed film critic for NBC’s Today show for years and not0rious for bad pun

foreign listeners can you hear me

Vintage Japanese Radio Ad promoting Can You Hear Me?

s and sometimes questionable reviews.

Long time listener Fake Bailey Jay has a couple of emails chastising Gustav for possible inaccuracies and omissions.

Touching back on the previous misogynistic discussion about female singers of the seventies and eighties, Gustav brings up one the sisters from Heart and Ty ties it all back to the mountain climber game on the Price is Right.

 

Gustav has an interesting report on a recent upsurge in foreign listeners of Can You Hear Me.  The new hotbeds for Can You Hear Me downloads outside the U.S. are Japan and Germany.  Heavy has a theory why but Gus just wants to know who these people are and why they listen to the ramblings of educated hillbillies.

They also have a new female listener who sends in a t-shirt idea and is currently trying to make her way through the entire back catalog of episodes.

So send us your emails telling us where you are listening from and how you found out about us to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod

Brad and the Sad Clown Painting

It’s a special episode this week with special guest Brad who joins the boys to talk robots, poor nutrition, pockets and a sad clown painting.  Brad wasn’t feeling well, but he showed up for free burgers and a chance to see Ty’s shining visage in person.  The professor is the co-host of the Below the Belt Podcast on the Blowout Podcast network, award winning historian, NPR guest and the author of Arredondo: Last Spanish Ruler of Texas and Northeastern New Spain

To get things going, Gustav mourns the social media death of Clay from Partial Recall.  RIP Clay.  Brad explains how he carries around a laser pointer.  See if you are as confused as the boys are.  That leads Ty to ask about pocket habits and where each of the guys store their wallets, keys, phones and assorted items.

There’s some Sam Elliott talk which then leads to Nick Offerman talk and the greatness of Ron Swanson.

Ty then offers up a hypothetical based on the movie “Passenger”.  It didn’t take long for the wheels to go off the rails in this discussion.  Brad loves Brokeback Mountain, but the guys have never seen it, but they take Brad’s word for it.  The concept of a robosexual relationship while on space ship is bandied about.

Gus had just heard the most recent episode of Brad’s Below the Belt podcast and he is fascinated by the lack of knowledge about medicines by both Brad and Ryan.  That leads to fever talk and some scary nutritional practices by Brad, including him eating soup for breakfast.

Then Gus unveils a special gift of a sad clown painting for Heavy.

sad clown painting

Longmires’ Hate Sad Clown Paintings

 

There is a discussion about Family Ties and Tina Yothers.  Not really sure how that happened.  Then Brad tells a story about a celebrity interaction on Twitter.  Ty tries valiantly to make a Sade joke.

The boys turn to emails.  Eduardo has an update to the frequent topic of trough urinals.  Gus reminds everyone about the episode of Tell Me Where to Turn where Glen tells his Devil’s Bowl Speedway story. Brad tries haiku.

Gus makes a stand as a cessati0nist and talks about his run in with painting of Jesus laughing.

Then an email from listener Steve wraps things up.

Email us your reports about pockets and clowns or anything else you want to share to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

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Adult Advice

The Can You Hear Me boys are back once again to talk about old stuff and help out a listener with some “adult advice”.  The guys love emails from listeners and are always happy to lend a hand.  You can email your questions or thoughts as well to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Gus shows up with an item from the guy’s childhood which prompts a discussion about Lee Majors in Fall Guy.  Once again, just like the ill fated episode where the guys weighed in on seventies and eighties female musicians, the boys dip their toe into some borderline objectification.  But to be fair, they are from seventies.

A discussion of pawn shops and their quality then brings Ty to wonder about today’s youth and their discovery of the world around them.

Gus and Ty recall their respective trips to the Crater of Diamonds State Park in Murfreesboro, Arkansas. As you can imagine, they have different views.

They settle in for a little lightweight banter about Graceland and how it must be viewed in historical context.

Gus opens up about his geekiness with some Dungeons & Dragons talk which is all just a set up for more goofy stuff his kids say.  Heavy fires some shots at LARPer’s and Gus recommends the Darkon documentary.

adult advice on watching porn with wife

Listen to Learn How to Navigate the Discussion about XHamster

And then Gustav reads a listener email seeking some “adult advice”.  The boys roll up their sleeves and try their best to actually do more good than harm and provide as much advice as three fortysomething year old dudes can muster. Listen and find out if they know what they are talking about or are just full of crap like normal.

Email us your favorite 80’s action tv show hero, adult advice or serious questions to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Find us on Twitter @realgustav @longmireheavy @tywebb3000 and @canyouhearmepod

Follow us on Instagram, Tumblr and Snapchat @canyouhearmepod

The Female Perspective

The three amigos are back together this week making each other laugh and somehow the female perspective is brought up.   But things start off a little rocky as Gustav has just had to fix Ty’s mic stand which leaves Gus distracted and the normal show introductions are forgotten, so if you are new to the podcast and don’t know who is who by voice:  Ty is the handsome sounding one, Gustav is the one that sounds like a hick and Heavy is the one and only.

Who knew three old men were so infatuated with blankets? But once again we stumble into afghan and blanket talk.  But that doesn’t last long as we dip our toes into the seventies version of Partial Recall’s world and talk about What’s Happening and the sequel What’s Happening Now? for a bit.  The Doobie Brothers episode always stands out.

Gus turns into a grammar hawk as he belittles people for misusing words and the guys share their pet peeves about people misusing words or making new words up (the sense of irony isn’t lost, but we blow right through it.)

In m0re old man news, the guys complain about recent updates to the classic board game of Monopoly.

The Hoyt Axton thread continues as Gus falsely attributes a songwriting credit to Hoyt, but it all works out because he’s wrong and we get a Michael Martin Murphy fun fact.

Ty brings another field report from his Rangers spring training trip, but this time it is about disparity in attractiveness between the male and female in couples he observed.  He wants everyone to keep an eye out for it and send in their own observations.  And that’s when Heavy offers the female perspective.

Then an email from Fake Bailey Jay  brings in more female perspective as she asks about female comedians.  Both Gus and Fake Bailey Jay have discussed this at length in real life and both of them love comedic actress Amy Sedaris, but Fake Bailey Jay knew she was lighting a fuse with this email.

After ranting about female comics, the guys turn their sights on female musicians where talent and attractiveness collide.  The female perspective is  abandoned as eventually the three just turn into grunting cavemen.

bangles eighties band female perspective

Who Knew Gus Would Get So Excited About The Bangles

 

Email us your reports about attractiveness disparity and female perspectives to canyouhearmepod@gmail.com

Join us on our sub-reddit for Can You Hear Me

Follow us on Twitter @canyouhearmepod @realgustav @tywebb3000 @longmireheavy

Find us on Tumblr and Instagram @canyouhearmepod